Newsletter: Wear boxer shorts and USB protective mask

Our top stories of the week

In this newsletter, as guests: Wigald Boning [applause], breathing mask with USB connection [applause], better Internet truck [applause], jokes, boxing shorts, Microsoft Flight Simulator 2020, etc. Glad you are there!

I ’m going to write a piece of news this week with the headline: “Please think about big things now”, and Deichkind songs with similar titles are already chasing me. You don't have to like the Nordic Dance Company. However, phrases such as "fire a laser at the world and leave with glasses"! -I ask you, how can you resist? Let's think about this newsletter together and read it-one arm dangles from your armored car-Michael sincerely welcomes you warmly.

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table of Contents

1. Armored car bread
   

2. Travel around the world on a Microsoft plane
   

3. Breathe clear mountain air anytime, anywhere
   

4. Otherwise that's it
   

5. Last but not least: Wigald Boning
   

6. This week's joke
   

I learned on Thursday afternoon that tomorrow is May 1st. There are things in these unfamiliar times, I have no holidays at all. Someone told me good things, otherwise I would open my laptop in a boxer on Friday morning, remove all beer bottles from the camera's perspective, pour half a bucket of ice water on my face, and then "appear" to work. Just like every day since locking. So tomorrow I will save a bucket of ice water. Little joy.

Sounds creepy, doesn't it? But locking is not a good thing for all of us. However, improvement is imminent, and it is time to consider free time and free time. I do n’t know you, but of course you have a lot of free time to catch up with, right? Therefore, the motto of today's newsletter is: Sprinkle, don't pad water. Let's think bigger! Therefore, the following suggestions deserve our attention.

Armored car bread

Does Elon Musk of Tesla know a few months after the introduction of the network truck [remember? Is that part of the so-called shatterproof glass? Haha!] Someone came, he 'S low-priced electric pick-up machine is so ridiculous it looks like what Armortruck did-maybe he will have it on the Model smallModel Third placeModel X And model ÿ There is no longer any cyberspace in the "s3xy" group. But he didn't. Now, our Elon must endure a more open tank.



Yes, the chances of electronic trucks and armored trucks meeting in the post-corona world are insignificant. Unless the Internet truck is driving into the TV, Kevin may be playing Mafia 3. You guessed it, Armortruck is not yet real, it actually exists on the computer. But this is an exciting concept.

Travel around the world on a Microsoft plane

The small jet was already on the tarmac. When you see the evening sun reflected in the tarmac, the last downpour was still very wet, and even you became romantic. Pure concentration is not needed now. Over the years, you have used various types of aircraft in Microsoft Flight Simulator to practice and studied their flight behavior. Now the situation has become very serious and you have taken off.



When you look out from the small side window, you have been in the air for several hours, and you are puzzled somehow. Are you dreaming or is he just … added raindrops? Will reality hit h? Is this just a bug in the matrix? You cross the airplane window to view your Laundry Mountain and are annoyed by the sudden reality grip: Laundry Mountain is the reality, and you can play the new Flight Simulator 2020 from Microsoft. We do n’t remember ever having such a realistic game. Make sure to convince yourself.

Breathe clear mountain air anytime, anywhere

For climate protection reasons, even after the current lock-in reason, we should urgently reconsider our travel habits. Microsoft's flight simulator is certainly good, but it can hardly replace vacation travel. We are human beings, and people must be at the door! In the future, there will be more and more dangers in breathing air. Should we arrange?



Viruses, pollen, exhaust gas, smoke, soot and particulate matter have long threatened our health, especially in metropolitan areas, which is why many health experts recommend wearing a mouthguard even afterwards. I can hear you calling like me: We are geeks! We can't sew! We hate schoolbags so much. We have to face technology! If you already have a respirator, please use the motor to connect with the app, thanks to the HEPA filter can filter more pollutants than the N95 mask, and can be charged through the USB-C connection. This is your mask.

Otherwise that's it

Last but not least: Wigald Boning

Sitting here in the home office, I really miss the informal communication with my colleagues at Netzwelt. Fooling around, and often leads to deeper conversations. Wigald Boning cannot replace both. But Vigard-I know him from Saturday night and "Stupid People", young people may be more from the "Gentleman next to" program-for me, I have become a real expert. Christian Drosten's work on viruses is very important, and Wigald now works for me in daily affairs. Real celebrity.

Is it normal to dizzy with a mask while shopping? Can you sometimes ignore one of the bids? Boning wrote a Corona diary on his Facebook profile. It is well worth reading because it shows very well: at present we all have the same concerns and we all have the same questions. For most of us, the overall situation is indeed cookies.

"Our new route is here, and we are taking two children on a trailer to the Deutsches Museum [Deutsches Museum] on the banks of the Isar. There are more activities there than last weekend; the trend of group formation is obvious. Roston is probably right. If he starts, he announced in June that the number of copies will more than double, and we will all be sent back to the living room. Yes, out of citizen ’s needs, I will give in because I Never contradict Robert Koch and his heirs.

At some weak moments, I also think that for virologists, these half-educated bastards will forget this trouble! Wash your hands and keep your distance-anyway, God is responsible for everything else. When you think the time is right, it can let you breathe the last breath-the respirator can pull hard.

Being able to appreciate the privileges of this event [called life] will greatly appreciate you. Think of thousands of sperm that did not play a role in conception. Me, you, us, you, stop giving me, fight, and enjoy the gift!

But I hardly dare to write something like this [unless in this diary], because otherwise you will soon accuse yourself of not participating in this "war", and at no time will you become a traitor, senior hater and sneeze By. I really am not. He Shi
Wigald Boning on Facebook

This week's joke

Who do you trust? Do you have leaders to guide you through your daily life? Do you want technical solutions, such as the masks provided in this press release or an application that can help you track contacts with infected people? As a media professional, we are very interested in your opinions. If you want to share or have other comments about this newsletter, Please write to: [email protected]. Before entering the long weekend, the weekly Flachwitz went on as usual, this time actually the classic Flachwitz. As always, do it well!

"What is the name of this game with baskets?
Yeah flirt!
There are even more jokes on Netzwelt."

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