No one’s panicking, but the latest batch of new additions to Xbox Game Pass gives everyone the ability to truly explore the depraved depths of the pudgy, bald man’s soul

you. you there! Fear. Very scared.

Xbox has just announced the arrival of another batch of Game Pass – games coming to the service in early October – including a completely cursed game that you can use to create your own sitcom fan fiction.

Yes, MLB The Show 24, a game I used to stage earlier this year in what scientists later quietly dubbed the “UberCostanza experiment,” is coming to Game Pass Standard (consoles) on October 2 launched on. Be warned. Stop using it to recreate the ninth-inning magic Francisco Lindor pulled off for the New York Mets the other day.

You’d be tempted to create a team made up of clones of Seinfeld characters who somehow end up worse than the historically bad 2024 Chicago White Sox. It comes for all of us. Tell your whole Costanzas I say hello.

What else comes with Game Pass, you ask? Didn’t you listen to the serious things I just said? ! wonderful. here you go. Open Roads (console version) published by Annapurna Interactive will also be released on Game Pass Standard on October 2, while Sifu (cloud, console and PC) will launch Game Pass Ultimate, PC Game Pass and Game Pass on the same fateful date Pass Standard.

Mad Streets (Cloud, Console and PC) is a beat ’em up game designed for party play, and once UberCostanza breaks containment tomorrow, the party may not be happening anymore, on October 7 Available in Ultimate, Standard and PC Game Pass. , the eerie deck-building roguelike Inscryption (cloud, console and PC) will hit the same three levels on October 10th.

Ann, here are the videos that will be discontinued on October 15th:

• Dyson Sphere Project (PC)

• Everspace 2 (cloud, console and PC)

• From Space (Cloud, Console and PC)

• F1 Manager 2023 (Cloud, Console and PC)

• Scorn (cloud, console and PC)

This wave of Game Pass games follows new additions in September, including some that were announced as upcoming or removed during the Xbox Tokyo Game Show livestream.

So be it. May you be protected from the worst sins this bald guy has ever committed and have the greatest answering machine message known to man.