Groundwater Update: An exhaustive fashion-fest explosion on Netflix

Armageddon and Pain and Discovery are the two foundations on which I built my Michael Bay apology house. Armageddon it's truly fun, as NASA hires everyone Bruce Willis to get into space and stop the asteroid from colliding with Earth. Also Pain and Discovery, in which bodybuilders have been played by Rock, Mark Wahlberg, and Anthony Mackie kidnapped Tony Shalhoub in an attempt to oust him, not only is America's ultimate ambition, suggesting that Bay may be aware of its reputation for being overweight. It's not like the standard rules for Bay movies, which would be an endless grind for "heavy on explosion and light on everything else" Transformers action. But they are different enough to suggest that eBay, given the license and freedom to escape the studio system, will be able to produce something else.

So it's disappointing to find out that the new Bayflix movie, 6 Underground, not happy at all.

The film, however, seems to have been founded on the difficult premise of "If you had great power, but in real life?" Ryan Reynolds stars as an eccentric billionaire who calls himself "One." He found five men and women (referred to in numbers, which is why this movie is a title) to become a vigilant group taking on criminals and dictators around the world. Obviously they all have certain skills – for example, "Six" (Dave Franco) is introduced as "Driver" – but the rules go well. When Sixth is replaced, his replacement, "Seven" (Corey Hawkins), not selected to play the role of pilot, has just been hired because he is a good soldier.

Photo: Christian Black / Netflix

All other designated roles look good; these rebels might also be the "Lady Doctor" or "Parkour Guy." That one size of mind is clear 6 Underground it feels like a screenshot of the title's relentless pursuit of an arcade game. Each non-playable character has something called right, and they rotate in a vapid, a recurring action until someone hits the start button on the controller. Aside from that, the characters never came out of that first impression, and the film, of course.

A mission that plays in the absence of a player / divine intervention is a means of extermination in the traditional nation of Turgistan. The party plans to overthrow the dictator (Loreor Raz) currently in power and replace his peaceful brother (Payman Maadi). To make that happen, One and his team travel across the country, taking occasional breaks to sleep in the area with each other to achieve the required level of T&A.

Of course, as they go along, they begin to realize that their status as "ghosts" – considered dead by their friends and loved ones, forced to separate any personal attachment to one another – may not be all that Despite One's concern about how "liberating" that is "dead." Seven receives Rule One by leaving any member of the party in trouble after finding it too difficult to follow, and cites his previous experience as a soldier as a reason he will never leave team members.

Photo: Netflix

The structure is really simple, and not bad in the sense. But it is full of scenes of illegal acts and pure dialogue (one scene features a character who is utterly paranoid about famous movie quotes) or whatever features may have been made 6 Underground the wonderful guardian is completely lost. This is the worst of the Bay, the explosive game "yes," and too much to watch. The action is so irresistible that it becomes more obvious than entertaining, and sometimes obligatory, e.g. “Shoot, we've got to find something Parkour Guy has to do. Skip some lines of construction, I guess? ”And there is no attempt to hide the film’s sponsors, from the Red Bull Stick Reynolds sports nail polish nail at the beginning of the movie to the spectacular shooting of Chopard and similar merchandise.

The film briefly plays on the idea that a man without a blueprint and unlimited access to resources and weapons – in fact, the real Tony Stark – is a terrible thing, 6 Underground it is too full of explosives to make room for any more complex characters than "guy-ass good good" and "bad guy." A passing dictionary, not to mention the area we've seen Reynolds tread often (Deadpool, Deadpool 2, Detector Pikachu, Hitman's wife, forthcoming It's free, the list goes on).

What strikes me most, however, is that among all the cacophony, there is one joke that shows the kind of happy Mayhem Bay. During the fighting, the falilantes created a sound that was meant to disturb the armed men who followed them. It's called a "song," but as the tone grows louder, its true path is clear: piercing ears Sound digital digital dance, stretched so that it cannot be seen until it breaks through all the glass in the building. It's a funny touch, but it's just the edge of something new in the movie that feels like it's being grounded, and ready to put on any viewer who makes the mistake of getting in.

6 Underground streaming on Netflix now.