PowerWash Simulator is why I shouldn’t be a homeowner

Humans are shitty, scared monkeys, and there’s absolutely no telling why our brains are lighting up with feel good juice. But one thing it does for me is a good pressure washer video. Since a millennium change means I’ll probably never own a house, the magic of using a pressure washer will forever be out of my reach. But thanks to the ingenious developers at FuturLab, PowerWash Simulator I will finally live the dream of blasting dirt off a dirty driveway.

There’s a damn anything simulator game out there these days. You can simulate driving a truck or running a farm, or if you have a little taste you can be a goat or even a helpless old grandma. PowerWash Simulator

Lets you simulate with a pressure washer and is intended for hopeless lunatics like me who spend their free time fascinated by YouTube videos of home improvement warriors blasting years gross from their porch and tiled driveways. The premise is very simple: In the demoYou have just started and are excited to meet customers. Pick one of the two jobs from your phone, then show yourself pressure washer in hand and get to work removing dirt from various surfaces.

Your ability to scrub dirt is affected by the type of nozzle used and the distance from the surface. If you stand too far away, just a little bit of dirt will peel off. If you get too close, you run the risk of damaging property, affecting your take-away payment. There are four different nozzles you can use with your pressure washer: there is a regular circular nozzle for wide surfaces, a flat nozzle like you would see in the average pressure washer video, and even a smaller nozzle for detailed work like cleaning Grout. I love the variety and how each nozzle is suitable for a specific cleaning job.

PowerWash SimulatorThe physics engine is decent. There are all kinds of non-dirty items around for your pressure washer to push around for fun. I giggled like an obsessed kid as I pointed my mortar nozzle at a garden gnome and made it fly with the click of a mouse. There’s a playground job, and you can turn tic-tac-toe tiles with your pressure washer. I was a bit baffled that I couldn’t do more damage with the pressure washer than with a broken window. Pressure washers are the closest thing to the damn laser beam any normal, non-mad scientist could ever get their hands on. If I point it at close range on a glass it should break.

The playing PowerWash Simulator Demo activated the part of my brain that calls for order. I loved pacing methodically up and down the side of a house to blow away dirt. This game will also trigger the lower instincts. Expect people to draw Hella tails on every available surface.

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