Chocobo GP is a really cute kart racer smothered by DLC and season crap

as verified final fantasy obsessed, i’ve always been Chocobo Racing, the PS1 kart racer, is basically a lighthearted mashup of the series.Despite the announcement of the Chocobo Racing revival for the Nintendo 3DS, I was saddened – so naturally I was excited when Square Enix announced the news Chocobo GP, the new FF racing game for Switch. However, after just a few days of playing, I’m done. I’m going out.

Chocobo GP yes great Kart racer. real. Obviously, this isn’t Mario Kart, but I’d definitely add its core mechanics and feel to top racers like Sega & Sonic All-Stars Racing and Crash Nitro Kart. But… for some reason, this game feels like a mobile game?

I need to be clear here. Chocobo GP is more or less a full-price game. It’s on the “budget” end of the $50/£40 Hyundai price range, but I think it’s a complete game. So why does it immediately give me the opportunity to buy the in-game currency Mythril for real cash? Once you fire it up, it feels like one of Square Enix’s gacha-powered mobile games like FF Brave Exvius or Record Keeper, down to the time limit you can hold currency, login bonuses, and all that stuff.

In some cases, what fans really want is locked behind these things. FF7’s Cloud Strife and FF8’s Squall Leonhart – beloved protagonists – are only playable characters in their meticulously rendered chibi form when you pay for the game’s first season pass, which costs 800 Mithril – slightly under $10.

You can get Mithril, and the launch of the promotion means basically everyone can sign up for Season 1 for free – but you can see where that goes in the long term. Nickel, a dime. Players are considered ATMs.

Obviously, many of these elements are just part of the modern game. We now live in a post-Fortnite world where seasons pass and constant rolling updates with associated regular costs are normal. However, from the moment you first launch the game, I’m amazed by the sheer number of Chocobo GP classes – as far as I’m concerned, it’s a testament to Square Enix’s plans to aggressively push these things into future seasons. The purpose is to get you used to it from an early age, to desensitize you.too disgusting

Square Enix has begun to move some of it back. There’s talk of relaxing and adjusting the amount of grind needed to unlock things. something like that. But the core system feels broken enough that minor tweaks to the revenue model will only go so far.

So here I am; I am out. I refuse to do so. I have my share of the gacha addition; I’ve poured hundreds of pounds into Final Fantasy: Keepers of Records in the years I’ve played it, and I’ve had so much fun. But something about the format feels wrong — and most importantly, misguided.

Chocobo GP is not something you might start every day. It’s not something you use your phone to pass the time in bed or in the toilet. This is a console game. Of course, that console is portable – but if I fire up a kart racer it’s probably because I want to play a little multiplayer or what have you.

I’d love to buy a DLC season pass for the other characters and later stages, but this game hit me with this free BS from the start…it just doesn’t fit. It’s a failure and it’s a huge shame – the core game is great.